On emotional maturity

Emotional maturity is not tidy, love or light.

Not the absence of the nasty side of us.

It is not one sided, ever.

I believe the full spectrum of emotions IS REQUIRED to be able to be emotionally mature.

How can you deeply understand a situation and come up with authentically mature response if you don’t have empathy for all the emotions?

How could you ever be emotionally mature if you only feel love and light?

Emotional maturity IS the process of listening to all the voices in our head AND choosing to act from the one that brings the best outcome to everyone.

Emotional maturity IS to be able to recognise that there is more than one emotion running under your skin, and that they are all valid (and contradictory) at the same time.

It is not the absence of the rage that makes you mature,

It’s the ability to feel it, process it and reflect compassion for oneself and others.

It’s the ability to say “I am faking angry right now, and I need to go for a walk so I don’t explode on you”

It’s the awareness of all levels of emotion you can have running through you at one time, and the recognition of those sides that makes you wise.

Again, it is not always smiling in front of adversity.

It is not the absence of the dark.