Great relationships don’t happen by accident -

You don’t just meet your ideal man and suddenly everything is perfectly smooth til the end of times.

I mean, you can definitely meet your ideal man (Tom is mine obviously) but things aren’t always smooth specially the first months (and I am so grateful they aren’t!)

When we get into relationships with people, specially if there is an intention to make it longish term... THINGS ARISE.

“I thought he was the right one but we are so toxic around each other” “The worst in me is coming up, I am not good for them”

Truth is, my friends, that toxic patterns will arise always as long as they are not addressed and healed within yourself. And the only way to address them and heal them is by working with them while they are playing out, not by running away from them.

So relationships get to be the perfect arena for those nasty things to come up,
and if you add commitment into the mix as well.. now you also have a partner who is helping you navigate through them.. and you are helping them navigate theirs...

RESULT? Even more deeper connection between the two of you. You have been vulnerable with each other. Things are not smooth all the time but you are grateful for it because these are all opportunities to know each other better. I mean get to know the real self of your SO.

So please don’t get discouraged when crazy old sheet you though was long gone starts to come up again. It’s not necessarily a reason to panic (sometimes it is).

If you don’t resolve them in this relationship, they will come back up again in your next one.
No matter how ideal your partner is.